Thursday, March 4, 2010

why I shaved my head and beard

1. Because I will jump off a cliff if all the cool kids are doing it.

2. Because it's a gesture of solidarity with patients and prisoners and those who must shave their head.

3. Because my heroes have always included mad scientists.

4. Because it is good to be reminded that if you lose your hair, you'll still look fine.

5. Because it's spring in Arizona.

6. Because it's a symbol of rebirth.

And therefore, two quick pics.

1. Obligatory author stroking chin:

2. Obligatory author making face:

(I never realized before that my idea of Scary Hands includes folding down the little fingers, which totally sucks for grabbing anyone. Maybe power beams are supposed to be coming out of my palms?)


  1. You may be trying for scary, but you still come across as a good lookin' guy. :)

  2. One of these days I, too, will gather up enough who-the-f***-cares, and shave my head like the cool kids.

  3. I dunno, I like the glare/reflection bit in your profile pic for the mad scientest look. ;) I'm loosing my chin scruff this weekend, but no smooth scalp for me. Too many dents in my dome.

  4. Queenie, aww!

    Grey, I recommend everyone do it once, just to know what it's like. But having a spouse or offspring can make it trickier--Emma has to look at it a lot more than I do.

    Jeff, why're you losing the goatee? I thought it looked sharp. (If the answer is the wife doesn't like it, die, scruff, die!)

  5. Physical renewal is a good thing. I like the solidarity thing, too. (me, I mostly gave up on hair awhile ago -- I crop it ultra short. Have thought about the clean look, but mostly wonder if I'd just be "wow, I have a funny head.")

  6. Gregory, you could try it. If you hate the result, you'll just have to wear a cap for a week or two.

    Blue, another influence!

  7. In my case, I'd have to wear it for six-nine months. My hair grows so slowly that one haircut a year, or maybe three in two years will suffice; I only had to shave about once a week before I let it go to a goatee- which took six months. I don't experiment much with my hair.

  8. Less about the hair and more about the fingers... perhaps you curl the pinkies because it makes your hands more velociraptor-esque. The Spielberg kind, not the feathered kind. Do you feel the urge to spit? :)

  9. Joel, maybe you're the cosmic balance for Emma, whose hair grows very quickly.

    Chris, only flames!

  10. LOL! I just hope you carry an umbrella and stay away from the eagles. Especially if they happen to be carrying turtles. We've already lost one writer that way.*

    *Yeah, I know it's probably just a funny story, but it's a heck of a funny story.

  11. So, Dragon-esque. Shoulda known. Jump back!

  12. Personally, I've been noticing that my forehead seems to go back a LOT further in other people's mirrors and cameras than it does in my own. So I've toyed with the idea of going baldhead.

    On the other hand, Hilde's always liked my hair, especially back when it was dark and shoulder-length. On the other other hand, she appreciates my having to shave my face for my current job, since it means she doesn't get moustache hair up her nose when we snuggle. ("Snuggle" is oldpeoplespeak for "making out".)

    (Yes, my userpic is still the old bearded one. It's a good pic, and I'll have that beard back someday.)

    Speaking of hands, perhaps you're unconsciously imitating comics when you fold your pinkies in for "Scary Hands"; my unresearched impression is that monsters in comics tend to have an unorthodox number of fingers and toes. (Fin Fang Foom, the Thing, Savage Dragon, etc.)

  13. They have a St. Baldrick's Day at Penn periodically. A bunch of Classics majors and a couple of the professors participated a few years back.

  14. The baldness does indeed give you the Mad Scientist look. Well, perhaps the Wisenheimer Scientist look :-).

    I've had mine off for over three years, and I like it. I recommend it to everyone at least once, as you said, for the feeling of renewal and the answer to the Grand Question "What would I look like bald?"